W Academy Story: Advancing Very Little! W Academy Newspaper Club – Track 05 “Tighten Your Body and…!”

Japan: On to the next question. “I have a request for you, newspaper club. Russia-san is bulky, so I was wondering if it feels hard or soft if you punch him in the stomach. Please look into it.” Russia-san seems to be the subject of this question.

Germany: More like the victim of it.

Italy: Would you mind if I run away?

Japan: I think it’ll be hard.

Italy: Then I’ll put 90 cents on it being soft.

*scene change sound effect*

Germany: So that’s the question we were sent. Would it be possible for me to take just one shot?

Russia: Sometimes I can’t believe how bold you are.

Italy: Babababa… Germany…babababa…

Russia: Hmm… I suppose I wouldn’t mind too much, but can I ask you just one thing?

Germany: Go ahead.

Russia: You won’t punch a hole in my stomach, will you?

Germany: Oh, don’t worry about that. It only needs to be hard enough for me to get a feel.

Japan: That only happens in manga and movies.

Russia: Your arm won’t get buried inside me?

Italy: Waaah, that sounds scary!! It doesn’t look like you’d be able to pull it out again!

Russia: You won’t get scared even if my stomach splits and a smaller version of me comes out?

Italy: AAAAAAARGH! I’M GOING HOOOOME!!

Germany: You can’t actually believe he can turn into one of his folk crafts? Now then Russia, I’m sorry for having to ask you this, but do you mind?

Russia: Sure, whenever you’re ready.

*DOITSU PUNCH!*

Do you get it now?

Germany: I get it. Thank you.

Italy: *shouting in the distance* Did he split open?! He didn’t, did he?!

Russia: Eh heh heh! I sure did!

Italy: EEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!

Germany: My findings conclude that underneath his sweater there’s some fairly solid muscle, but I felt my fist sink into it.

Japan: In other words, we still have no idea.

Russia: Write a good article, ok?! By the way, if a newspaper at my place criticizes my boss, there’ll be a terrible BANG!

Italy: EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!