- Translation by: spaceinvaderdud
- LJ Post
America: So, how should we do this? You wanna count sheep? I would go first, but you’d definitely fall asleep. I’ll allow you to count first!
England: Don’t cry to me tomorrow morning! I’ll put you to sleep first and I’ll prove to you that I was right!
America: OK! Well, I think it’ll be impossible for you, but you can do whatever you want! Ha ha ha ha ha!
England: Shut up! Just get into bed already!
America: Yeah yeah. *tucks himself in* Standing by ready for the count!
England: All right!
England: Hey wait, you should really cover yourself properly! You’ll catch cold!
America: Man, you really are a nag! By the way, what’s a cold anyways?
England: Ah, whatever. I’m counting now.
*Smug delinquent count. Counts until 1:22. Counts 10 sheep.*
America: There’s no way I’m going to fall asleep to that former punk counting style!
England: Shut up! Who are you calling a former delinquent?! Just be quiet, put on your blanket and close your eyes!
America: Owowowowow! Too much power! I’m shocked that a gentleman is using this much force!
England: Shut up, you! I’m just making sure you’re tucked in! Now you’ll see the true power of the British Empire!
America: Yeah yeah. Looking forward to seeing that~.
*Smugleaf count. Counts until 2:21. Counts 20 sheep.*
England: How’s that? I bet you’re feeling a bit sleepy now!
America: Huh? I don’t feel like sleeping at all!
England: Ah, oh really? Well, we’re just getting started anyways! I’m continuing!
*Counts until 3:26. Counts 30 sheep.*
America: England, I’m bored!
England: Good! The boredom will put you to sleep.
*America gets out of bed*
England: Hey, why are you getting out of bed?! Lie down, put on your blanket and close your eyes!
America: I can’t help it! After all, *stomach growls* I’m so hungry that I can’t sleep!
England: Oh, you were hungry? Don’t tell me you’re going to eat another hamburger this late at night. That’s why you’re overweight, you know?
America: Shut up! Don’t call me overweight! Sorry to disappoint you, but I don’t feel like going out and buying a hamburger now so I’m not eating one. Unfortunately, I ate the last of my ice cream during the movie.
America: I’m so hungry and I don’t have a single thing to eat! Oh! Could this be one of the trials a hero must overcome?!
England: Some trial… Ah well, if you’re really that hungry…*brings out something with a doom riff* Wanna eat this?
America: I’m going to regret asking this, but what is that?
England: Huh? What are you saying? This is one of my special homemade scones!
America: …Ohh~
England: D-Don’t get the wrong idea now! I’m not giving this to you for your sake. You said that you couldn’t sleep because you were hungry so I’m giving you this so you can sleep so I can win! I’m doing this all for me now! …If you really are hungry, you can eat this.
America: No way.
England: What the hell did you say, you punk?! I’m being generous too!
America: If I eat something like that, I won’t get full and fall asleep, I’ll just get food poisoning!
England: Bastard! How dare you insult me! Let’s go outside, WANKER!
America: *sigh* I’ll just have to wait until morning. Are you fine with me not eating though? If you remember what I said earlier, my hunger was keeping me awake. Wanna throw in the towel?
England: Damn it… We’re just getting started! Come on, cover up!
America: Owowowoww!
England: Calm down, me. Getting angry is exactly what America wants me to do. Focus… *erotic breathing*
America: Ennn-ggggllll-aaaaaaa-nnnnnddddd! Annnyyy timeeeee nowwwww!
England: Shut up! I’m counting soon! *breathes heavily* All right!
*Counts until 6:44. Counts 40 sheep.*
England: Oh, look’s like he’s finally gotten quiet. He really should’ve done this when I began. Guess that’s because never listen to what anyone else says.
America: *yawn* What is it? I’m not going to listen to any lectures if that’s what you’re gonna do.
England: Just one more push! All right!
*Counts until 8:08. Counts 50 sheep.*
England: America?
America: *mumbles*
England: Oh yeah, I won! Way to go, me! *laughs* That’s the true power of the mighty British Empire!
England: Still, he really has grown big. He was so cute when he was little too… Too bad his backbone and ego had to grow big too.