- Translation by: spaceinvaderdud
- LJ Post
Prussia: Just how awesome, oh awesome, I am? I am as awesome as awesome me can be!
*opens door*
Prussia: Yo, excuse me! Oh, you must be the poor soul who said you couldn’t sleep! You certainly are a smart cookie to ask me to count sheep to you! After all, I am the best sheep counter in the world! Kesesesese~! Now your ears shall listen to counting as cool as a baby chick! You’re definitely going to fall into that category! The category of sleeping after I count 10, no wait, five sheep! Well, just leave everything to me! I plan to follow through with what I just said! I’ll make sure you fall asleep, no matter what it takes! Now then, are you ready to sleep?
*not yet pause*
Prussia: Oh, not yet? I see. That’s fine. Mosey on into bed, now!
*into bed pause*
Prussia: Hey now, cover up with your blanket properly!
*It’s okay pause*
Prussia: It’s not okay! What are you gonna do if you caught a cold? Listen up! If you give a cold an inch, it’ll take a mile! When you don’t get enough sleep, your body’s, uh, your body’s, uh, what was it, uh, your body’s thingamabob gets weak and it’ll be easier to catch a cold! We can’t have your body temparature going down too! In Japan, they say that, uhh, uhh, In Japan, the cold is the source of the whatchamacallit… Oh yeah, now I remember! The cold is the source of all diseases… or something like that. I got that one from my little brother some time ago. Well, I am just trying to remember this second-hand, but you should listen to this advice! All right?
*puts blanket on entire body pause*
Prussia: Good, you’re as snug as a bug! I’m counting now!
*Surprisingly calm count. Counts until 2:58. Counts 10 sheep.*
Prussia: How was that? Perfect, wasn’t it? Oh, I understand just how you feel! You’re trying your hardest to stay awake just to hear my awesome counting! You’ve certainly done an excellent job to not sleep at 5 sheep! However, you should stop doing that for today and get some sleep! I’m going to count again! All right, I’m putting you to sleep this time!
*Counts until 4:30. Counts 20 sheep.*
Prussia: All right, mission complete. Now then, I shall make an awesomely quiet ex- Wait, how can you still be awake even after hearing my perfect counting?
*can’t sleep pause*
Prussia: You can’t sleep? Did you take too much naps or something? No? Then what is it?
*Overwork pause*
Prussia: I see. I guess you can be so tired that you end up wide awake. *sighs* Everyone never seems to listen when someone says not to overwork. You should take things in moderation too. I will make you fall asleep! Come on, close those eyes. I’m going on.
*Counts until 6:38. Counts 30 sheep.*
Prussia: Still not feeling tired, huh? *sighs* Hurry up and fall asleep. Sleep fast, wake fast, and eat a big, hearty breakfast in the morning! That’s standard, you know! Oh hey, do you know about maple syrup? It’s a miracle syrup that will guarantee happiness and blessings when you eat it! I received some of Canada’s maple syrup and it is freakin’ awesome! If you pour some on a stack of pancakes, it’s like pure heavenly happiness on a breakfast plate! Seriously, this is something I give my full, awesome approval. I’ve happily obliged myself to keep spreading the word of maple syrup! You need to hurry and fall asleep so you can eat a big, tasty breakfast! Okay?
*all right pause*
Prussia: Good! All right, I’ll give it one more count!
*Counts until 10:12. Counts 50 sheep.*
Prussia: Speaking of breakfast, the pancakes that I put the maple syrup on were made by my little brother. The pancakes he make are awes-
*rolls in bed*
Prussia: Oh. Already in Dreamland. I wonder if the breakfast talk actually worked. Man, talk about simple. Still, no one could stay awake after hearing my awesome sheep counting! Now then, I guess I’ll hit the road…
*pause*
Prussia: Heh… Sleep tight. Gute Nacht.