FRANCE: Mm…Chapter 2, in the first town.
ENGLAND: He’s late…I feel that maybe I’m the only one logged in. (paces) Dammit, they’re the ones who invited me! But it turns out that I’m the only one who came…
(flashback)
AMERICA: I’ve created an online game, like w88 viet nam, by a joint development between Japan and I! Would you like to play it?
(end flashback)
ENGLAND: But from looking at the instructions manual, It says you can play alone…I’ll just play for all the others as well! (opens manual) Let’s see…it looks like I’m a “summoner” and that I can call a cool-looking beast by reciting a spell. Hey, what is this, it seems that I’m pretty powerful! Come, my summoned beast! (roaring, followed by cute fairy-sound) Wow! So cute!
AMERICA: What are you doing?
ENGLAND: Oh, you’re finally her-, hey, you’re so late!
AMERICA: So sorry! It was because it took so long-(huge metal thump)-to make this new weapon!
ENGLAND: That’s way too big! Don’t bring something that looks like a final weapon from the beginning!
AMERICA: How is this? Isn’t it sooooo cool? Perfect for a gunner like me! Don’t you want one too?
ENGLAND: No thanks! You’re so childish, being so happy over something like that. Besides, something so heavy and large as that would be cumbersome.
AMERICA: What~! The size is the best part! Look! (swings weapon around) It’s so heavy, it has more destructive power when used as a blunt weapon than as a gun!
ENGLAND: That’s perfect for you…
RUSSIA: (walks in) Have I kept you waiting? Sorry for being late, my preparations took some time.
AMERICA: Hey, it’s Russia! Thanks for coming, hope you’re having fun!
ENGLAND: (to himself) Wha-didn’t know Russia was coming too… (to Russia) …anyway, why are you so dirty?
RUSSIA: Ahaha, just some minor problems…it’s my first time playing an American online game, and I didn’t know it would take 4 hours to download, 1 hour for installation, and 2 hours for the tutorial.
AMERICA: Stop that~! Unlike your games, you don’t wake up to find that everyone else has turned ferocious, and simply given a wrench without any explanation in such a situation!
RUSSIA: Hehe, you can do anything with a wrench! I’d like to try it out on you~
ENGLAND: …stop that, beginners starting a fight in the first town and facing mutual destruction would not be nice!
RUSSIA: Oh yeah, this is a gift for you! (drops large, wriggling object)
ENGLAND: Some kind of a…large creature’s leg?
RUSSIA: Hehe!
AMERICA: Haha…I feel that maybe Stage*bleep*’s final boss’s leg looked something like that..but I’m not going to worry about things like that!
MERCHANT: 20 sets of healing potions over here!
EXTRAS: So cute! Please give me one set each of the blue and red china dress sets!
CHINA: Hong Kong, healing potions are out of stock here! Send a carrier pigeon over to Shanghai to secure some more!
HONG KONG: You work people too hard. I wanna go home soon.
CHINA: HURRY UP-aru!
ENGLAND: Is that…China?
AMERICA: Oh, yeah, looks like him. When I invited him, China looked unwilling, but he seems to be pretty into it now!
RUSSIA: China-kun looks so happy when he’s doing business.
AMERICA: Hey China, you look pretty enthusiastic-are you liking this game?
CHINA: You guys were so late…the system’s ok, I guess I’ll keep playing-aru.
HONG KONG: Oh~it’s England. It’s like long time no see.
ENGLAND: Hey, China! And…Hong Kong, long time no see…
HONG KONG: I’m just kind of an attendant for teacher. I’ll leave soon.
CHINA: Don’t go yet! Go after we’ve sold this specialty Egg Tart.
ENGLAND: Haha, you can probably enjoy this game enough just in the first town.
CHINA: Thanks. I’m not one to end in this town. This is only a preparatory step.
RUSSIA: It’s preparatory?
CHINA: YES-aru! If I have enough of the currency in this game-“heta”-, I can buy strong weapons and avoid enemy-filled roads by using vehicles. Which means, I can have an easier time with anything.
ENGLAND: I-Is that true?
CHINA: Anything and everything difficult can be solved with heta. I’m a genius for earning so much from the beginning. You can praise me as much as you want.
HONG KONG: Well, I can understand that, but…to be blunt, isn’t “not playing the game” the least troublesome option?
EVERYONE ELSE: (sigh/gasp)
RUSSIA: Well, going by that logic, life itself is the most troublesome.
HONG KONG: Hm, can I use that joke somewhere?
AMERICA: Hahaha~! I can have fun anywhere!
ENGLAND: (sigh) Don’t say such discouraging stuff…
FRANCE: (sparkling sounds) HA HA HA HA Hey everyone~! So small~!
ENGLAND: Wh-, what is that?
FRANCE: FU FU FU FU! It’s the entrance of the main character you’ve all been waiting for!
CHINA: Where is that v-voice coming from-aru?
RUSSIA: Hm? I think from above. Look!
AMERICA: Huh? Above…?
FRANCE: HA HA HA HA! (more sparkling) Oni-san’s here! Oni-san’s a little scared!
AMERICA: That, up on the tower?
FRANCE: It’s the world’s oni-san!
CHINA: Aiaa, what is that…?
FRANCE: Hey, I’m really cool, right? So I wanted to make a great first appearance…
RUSSIA: Hey~France-kun~! You’re really cool!
FRANCE: Merccciiiii! So, it was all good that I climbed up, but oni-san can’t get down! I would like to get down easily with magic or something!
ENGLAND: (monotone) Aahh, there’s some weird person up there!
FRANCE: Ouch, ouch, magic-don’t hit me with magic!
ENGLAND: (monotone) Aahh, there’s some weird person-
FRANCE: Hey, I said it hurts! You’re hitting me even though you know who I am, right???
ENGLAND: Take this, Britannia Beeeeam!
FRANCE: Wait, wait-if you use that, we’ll face mutual destruction!
RUSSIA: I’m so jealous, they’re such good friends. (To America) I’d like to do things like that with you, too.
AMERICA: No thanks, you take such things rather seriously.
RUSSIA: Ahahaha!
AMERICA: Hahahaha!
CHINA: I don’t like being around these guys…
HONG KONG: Hey, is he trying to make him fall down? Unbelievable.
CHINA: Unbelievable.
AMERICA: Alright, let’s go on an adventure with this party!
(screams from France)
NARRATOR: Thereafter, no one has heard about their whereabouts.