- Loosely based on various strips
- Translation by: splatteredminds
- LJ Post
Announcer: Lovely Axis Powers
Japan: “Done so, the Japanese apricot blossoms comfortable in the room.” People say so, but… Since I opened myself to other countries, I’ve been gazing in amazement at how they do things. I’ve been experiencing the cultures of all these peoples and, for someone who’s been indoors since the reign of Tokugawa, this is very stimulating.
Italy: *in the distance* Uwahhhh! I already said I was sorry!
Japan: Yes, that is what I wish for…
Japan: *runs up to Italy* What has happened, Italy-kun?
Italy: Ah, Japan! You know, I was out training a bit just now. But then Germany started chasing me. If Germany comes here, tell him I can’t become all muscular, and that I don’t want to run anymore, so just tell him I went to buy some gelato. Ve! Well then!
Japan: Again? How about trying to take it seriously once in a while?
Italy: I’ll die with that spartan training! He makes me jump as if I were a rabbit! My leg snapped the first time. That’s just impossible for me…
Germany: *in the distance* HEY, ITALY!! WHERE ARE YOU?!
Italy: Wahh! Oh, shoot! Later!
Japan: Ah, Italy-kun!
Germany: ITALYYY!! *walks up to Japan* Ah, Japan. Just a while back, Italy ran away from training again. Did he come this way?
Japan: He left a message. Eh… *imitates Italy* “If Germany comes here, tell him I can’t become all muscular, and that I don’t want to run anymore, so just tell him I went to buy some gelato.” So it was…
Germany: T-that little… Every day, every day, the same thing happens… He won’t be able to train at all at this rate! There’s no way around it… Today, once he returns when he’s hungry, even if I have to tie him down and gag him, I have to spend two hours teaching him the fundamentals of physical strength and the importance of training.
Japan: Calm down, calm down. I don’t believe Italy-kun is doing any of that with bad intentions.
Germany: But, you know, physical strength is what makes you achieve a lot of things. Can’t he get that into his head?
Japan: *chuckles* Well… But don’t you think he has more physical strength than we thought? Since he manages to run away from you every day.
Germany: I have the feeling that’s a slightly different thing, though…
*loud explosion*
Japan: W-what’s this?!
Germany: *sighs* Ah, it must be that. Sorry for startling you. It’s him.
Japan: “Him?”
*door opens*
Germany: Austria! You’ve blown up a sponge cake again, haven’t you?
Austria: Oh, good day. No, I’m just casually cracking some eggs. Is there a problem?
*small explosion*
Germany: I don’t really know how you do it, but can’t you prepare <i>common</i> eggs in a <i>normal</i> way? This is bad for my heart.
*small explosion*
Austria: Then why don’t <i>you</i> crack them?
Germany: Me? You want me to break those eggs that were making those humongous noises? I have no other choice, then… *takes a deep breath* L-Let’s do it.
*egg cracks normally*
Germany: They’re normal…
Japan: These are… eggs that change the sound of cracking with every person. This is very intriguing… This is something I absolutely want to research in my country!
*shake shake*
Austria: Oh, what’s this wheat flour?
Germany: It looks like if you mix in white flour, they won’t make any noise.
Japan: This is really strange.
Germany: Austria, ever since you moved in to my place, everyday you have… how to explain it? If you keep making such strange noises, I won’t be able to stand it anymore! You even scare the dogs, Aster, Blackie and Berlitz to death.
Austria: First and foremost, the reason I came to this place… it was all because you made me merge with you, wasn’t it, you great dolt?!
Germany: Stop saying things that can be misinterpreted!
Japan: Ah, uhm, it’s fine. I really don’t mind what happened here at all.
Germany: Oh, God! Why does it always have to turn out like this?
Austria: That’s because you got together with that dolt, Prussia.
Japan: Ah… These European affairs are too complicated and inscrutable. I can’t understand them at all…
Japan: Well, well, both of you gentlemen. In this large world, there may be things that make strange noises when you cook them.
Germany: As if they’d exist!
Austria: I-it’s not as though I’m making these noises because I’m fond of them.
Italy: *runs up to join them* Germany! Germany, look, look! You know, you know, when I was having some ice cream earlier, this cat came up to me! It’s so cute!
Germany: *furious* IiiitaaalyyyYYYY!!
Italy: EEEEEEP!! Uwah!! I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I apologize for having run away!
Austria: Hey, Germany!
Germany: Today’s the day when I won’t forgive you!
Austria: Are you listening to what I’m saying?!
Germany: You’re running away every single day!
Japan: Come on now, everyone! Please calm down!
Italy: EEEYAHHHH!!!
England: *laughs* To spy on the Axis Powers was indeed the right thing to do. It looks like their alliance is going to break apart easily.
France: Yes. However, I already had the premonition it would turn out like this while Italy was with them.
England: *laughs* As I thought, Britannia’s force is something else. Remember that, you frog-leg.
France: No, this has nothing to do with your power…
England: No, no, of course it does! Yesterday, before going to sleep, I did as I always do, and wished upon a star that they’d feel like they were having a stomach ache. And, my pinky nail, I’ve been growing it out!
France: I see… Oh, don’t worry, I’m not freaked out or anything. Then… let me break it… that pinky of yours.
England: Hm? Have you grown afraid of my power? Only because I wished for it, they’re in such a mess… The moment my pinky’s fingernail grows out fully, even more dreadful circumstances will develop…
France: Ah.
England: What is it?
France: After so much fighting shall we make peace with some afternoon tea?
England: What?! You’ve gotta be kidding!
Italy: The strudel is good. The apple is good.
England: Ah! That’s… quite…
Japan: Would you mind telling me the reciple? Kimura-san, the owner of a youkan shop on the 3rd street, has a particular interest in Western cakes.
Austria: Oh yes. I wouldn’t mind. I still have some ingredients left over anyway.
Germany: The Linzer Torte you made the other day was delicious, too. Why don’t you ask him how to make that, too?
Japan: Most certainly!
England: Dammit… This is so ticking me off…
France: But it’s making me envy them somehow.
England: So annoying… It’s regrettable, but… it’s surely because this old, stupid, fucking idiot is next to me! Just die!
France: Same goes for me. I wouldn’t want to make out with this thick-eyebrowed, hallucinatory, punk pervert next to me.
England: *sighs* Dammit. I don’t even have the energy to hit you.
France: I’m envious… No matter what they say, they’re still allies. *chuckles* Well, there’s no way around it. Shall we go have a drink today, then?
England: Guess so. By the way, I’m just going to have a drink with you on a whim. I’m still not over the War of the Roses. Do you understand, I-
France: Ah, yes, yes.
Japan: *gets up* Oh? I feel like someone was here. *opens the door* Ah, there are footprints of two people. Well, as far as my memory reaches, I can only think of those two. However… I wonder why they went home without doing anything.
Germany: Japan, what happened?
Japan: Oh, nothing. I was just thinking that European circustances are very complicated indeed.
*owl hoots and crickets chirp*
Italy: Wee, I’m in! I’m feeling so refreshed! Japan, won’t you come in, too?
Japan: Italy-kun, please wear your shorts! I would like to look at the moon for a while longer.
Japan: Oh full moon, you who are as a silver blaze in the night sky. Many things have happened since I’ve become allies with these people. Ah, no. Sometimes there is so much going on that I don’t know what to do, but there are many things I can learn… or… not…
Italy: Gelato is so yummy…
Japan: Wahh! You are eating gelato right after a bath?! It’ll be bad for your stomach!