Original (2008/04/06): Current External Site | Kitayume (archive.is)
Translation: unknown
So France is having a hangover and I was asked to hi-jack this site~
But I don’t know what I’m supposed to do~
Ah whatever~ I’ll just make it up as I go~
Wish me luck everyone~!!
I’ll even try to last until 6:00 AM~
>> How is France doing? He’s alive, isn’t he…?
[T/N: link ↑ is relevant, so do click.]
So it’s a lying spree!!
It’s like a free day and about anyone can do pranks!!
(I’m about to give everyone some news stories as a joke!)
 【A Polander was made a World Heritage】  UNESCO has officially registered a Polander as a World Heritage on the 1st of April.
A Lithuanian, friend of the Polander said, “I’m honestly bewildered. If he is appointed to the World Heritage, then helping him change or making him food would need permission from UNESCO~ I don’t know what I’m going to do. And I suggest he quit it with the pink houses.” and was expressed with a bitter smile.
【An unbelievable scene in Russia】 Rabbits in Russia have been acting strange. Within a span of 70 seconds, without notice, they returned to the snow mountains. The citizens called this the Baltic Miracle. The young man with glasses whom he knows well went “I’ve never seen such a scene. Usually one would say ‘Ooh that’s scary. Global warming can cause strange phenomenon, right? We might have to go to Estonia to sight-see if we want to improve the environment.’” Someone beside him, because of intense fear, was brought to the hospital. 【Fukushima students working on an OTAROID!?】 “Endure anything” has different capabilities from normal robots. It can’t clean nor make objects disappear but, it can, however, play and understand erotic games, tell if certain erotic books are good or not, and even recognize voice actors and actresses. Yes, it has really strange abilities. We were able to have an exclusive interview with Toyama-kun. ――What did you have trouble with when you were developing the Otaroid? ―This “Endure” robot, what can this android do to help improve society? [T/N: Otaku + Android = LOL. It was named “wo taemon” which technically is “endure __”, so when you say “nandemo wo taemon”, it’s “endure anything”. 【Success in the development of Spain who can read the atmosphere・Japan-America】 Also during the meeting where Venezuela attacked them, “I want to understand you. Spain does not go for offensive methods.” was their speech.
【Italian festivals start here】 Amidst the festival, people sing, dance, eat and drink the whole day. It’s extremely lively. During this time, people stop working to show their devotion to the festivals. 【Egypt talking in long sentences, witnessed】 At around 3:00 on the 4th, while walking in front of a museum, Egypt just suddenly started talking to a Turkish man called Adnan-san. He couldn’t believe how much Egypt was saying. 【In Athens, a meeting was held by a union for cats! but… it’s pretty rare!】 At first, both countries wanted to hold a cultural exchange meeting but the countries’ representatives both fell asleep for 45 seconds during the opening ceremony, it was really a weird happening. [T/N: That guy with Greece is Ichihaya Hatoba. His profile says he loves cats and his naming sense is very random, just like someone we all know (ｷωｷ)] 【”Sugita Genpaku” is now The Street’s Maeno Ryoutaku raー big hit!!】 This Sugita Genpaku represents Sugita Genpaku’s kindness and humility, composed into a song. [T/N: The “Kaitai Shinsho” (解体新書) lit. the “New Book on Anatomy” is a translation of “Ontleedkundige Tafelen”; Maeno Ryoutaku helped with this project, though Sugita Genpaku remains the more popular proponent.] 【High-school student Aizu’s brilliant achievement! He succeeded in cooking・Aizu】 His “devastating” sense of cooking was successful but, today, someone actually told him that it tasted good, for the first time ever. [T/N: Aizu is an area in the Fukushima Prefecture. S’why I left Aizu Homare as is even though his profile says it’s Aidu, meh.] 【A Brit’s first brilliant achievement! He succeeded in cooking・England】 For 1000 years, no one in England has succeeded in making a successful dish ever, so England’s cooking became a representation of the country’s development. 【”Our Matchless Princess, Unimaginable” was a big hit worldwide】 There had been daily reports of Americans crying in Japan. Our “Matchless Princess”, the modern revival of Sangokushi, was done on such a big scale, that it was directed by Sweden’s film company. It was said to go up to 8 million more cardboard boxes. Famous character Shinatty-chan was promoted to playing Ryuubi, while newbie Bamtaro, who had amazing stage presence, was assigned to play Koumei. An American who first saw this play commented: “It’s like a lot of Japanese Anime characters came out, I really liked it. Although that scene of Cha-han saving the village, flying with the wind, was a bit over the top.” [T/N: Sangokushi = Records of the 3 kingdoms; Ryuubi would be Liu Bei and Koumei would be Zhuge Liang. 【Year 2008’s top breeder has been decided・America】 He has become a well-known dog breeder around the world. It is said that he can also breed other living things aside from dogs. 【Canada, found and captured・America】 According to the reports, they were eating breakfast together at Canada’s place. 【Canada has been reported missing・America】 It happened a few minutes after Canada was found and captured. An American reported that he just took his eyes off of Canada for a while and then he was gone. 【Female student finds 3 naked male students in classroom. They were arrested.】 3 men were completely naked, exposing themselves in front of a female student. They were arrested for misconduct. [T/N: Antartic Adventures, a very epic game, if I do say so myself xD but why they’re naked?… IDK. 【The Cafe of Origins is really famous・South Korea】 Today, this cafe has been so famous that it has been getting hard to reserve seats. It seems the waitresses there claim they’re the origin of a lot of things.
【The legendary creature, Heidi, found・Switzerland】 According to the legend, it rides on a 27m long swing.
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Something unfathomable occurred in Russia.
Japanese high school students surprised the whole world with their creation of an android the world has never seen before called “OTAROID”.
While the Japan-America joint development was going on, Spain who was very good at reading the atmosphere, appeared.
In the southern part of Italy, in the Old Naples territory, is where the festivals begin.
Several people witnessed Egypt talking in long sentences to a Turkish traveler in Cairo.
In Athens, Greece, a meeting for Japan and Greece’s cat fellowship: “The Cat Union” was held. 
The other day, Singer/DJ Honda-san, with his own expenses, released a CD on The Street’s Maeno Ryoutaku ra―. This CD has secretly become a famous product and was out of stock in stores everyday.
Living in Yokohama, Aizuwakamatsu High-school student, Aizu Homare-san has cooked successfully for the first time in his life.
An English man living in London, England-san, has succeeded in cooking for the first time.
The ever famous Sangokushi, a Chinese historical novel, was re-arranged in a really different angle called “Our matchless princess, unimaginable” which was a big hit.
The annual dog show event was held the other day for the year 2008. There, a German man called Germany-san, marvelously won first place.
A man from New York City, America, who has dreamt of catching Canada, has finally done it.
Canada, who was just minutes ago, found and captured, is now mysteriously missing.
Within the famous World W Academy’s garden, something really odd happened.
“Welcome back! Your origin is me, y’know.”
For many years, Heidi, that was thought to be a legendary creature, was seen in a picture taken by a German photographer one afternoon at around 3 days ago.
Thanks for keeping us company!!
■April Fool’s Sequel■
Thank you very much!!
■Opening fake news to the public a bit!■
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【Carry overs occur at Noto6, winner was tragically wounded・Sunday】
In the famous lotto place, Noto 6, 6 billion yen was carried over to K.Kabe-san who magnificently won. ＊Guess who runs Noto6!? >> High-school student Funai Nishinomaru-kun wins 1M Yen in the lottery! ＊The winner was 15 years old. The one who picked it up was 17. [T/N: Owari Miwako is the one above Toyama. >> On a certain day in April, Japan made pasta with natto in it. Because Italy had rejected pasta for the very first time, ＊There was actually a time when they recommended natto to Germany. >>・Rentals of “heart insertion” have started in Russia. ＊Hearts that do not burn. 【Sealand-kun declares endangered species to the WWF】 ＊It’s good he did. 【Establishing that Hanatamago sheds 3 times repeatedly】 ＊Too scary!! 【Hungary-san’s manga debut (Sunday)】 Hungary-san had the debut of her manga in Japan. The manga contains the pure love of 2 men for each other, a heart-throbbing love story. ＊Seems like her manga’s demand rate is getting higher and higher. 【Latvia・International Learning Attainment Degree Exam, brilliant achievement~ Ranking No.1 in Problem Solving~】 According to OECD, each nation hosts an International Learning Attainment Degree Exam, which includes 4 categories: Reading ability, Math literacy, Science literacy and Problem solving. Latvia magnificently ranked no.1 in problem solving. Moreover, the first place of the reading comprehension category went to South Korea. The idea of the marker going diagonal surprised a lot of countries, including Japan. ＊Latviaaaa!!! [T/N: Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development] 【Japan’s “I’m sick of 2d” April 1st, Japan’s “Anti-2d・Ex-hikikomori declaration” was released. At the same time, from Akihabara “City of Moe and Electronics” to “City of Suits (lol) and Outdoors”, and other such reformations were announced. ＊I can’t stand making bonfires and toasting marshmallows everyday! [T/N: Hikikomori (引き籠もり): I would’ve put “recluse”, but they’re kinda more extreme, uhh yeaaah.] 【Japanese-English alliance, once again】 ＊There’s no such thing as a 2.5d. 【Hungary-san’s weapon from a frying pan to an earthenware pot…】 ＊What a cool weapon. 【Historical!! The birth of the Student Council who controls the world】 ＊Will a Frere Organization actually exist!? The Student Council President battle sounds interesting. 【Sealand is recognized as a country!?】 ＊…When did that happen!?! >> What about Su-san who is fluent in the country’s standard language?? ＊But if Italy started talking normally then… >> Everyone ate China’s snacks. Hungary and Prussia are getting married!? ＊”Because I bought the pot, I was able to marry!” |