Iceland: It looks like Nordic 5, act 2 is starting. Apparently it’s called “The Case of Sweden Beating up Denmark Too Many Times.” Hmph. Not that I really care about this.
Finland: Aww, Ice went home.
Denmark: It’s fine, is it?
Finland: It’s not fine, Denmark! I just remembered this, but the reason we were getting together today was to discuss a way to make goods manufactured in the Nordic countries better! Isn’t that right, Sve?
Finland: W-why are you glaring at me, Sve?!
Sweden: (thinking) I wanted t’ tell Fin that we could all just get t’gether again another time, but…
Denmark: Well, we can’t exactly continue our discussions if Ice’s gone home! The five of us can just get together again another time! It just means that we have an excuse to do this again!
Finland: Mm, now that you say that, I guess you’re right. I guess it’s fine if you think of it as another chance for us to all get together. It’s too bad that Ice went home and all, but at least now we know that Ice and Nor are brothers. Let’s think of this positively!
Sweden: Denmark said what I wanted t’ say b’fore I could…
Norway: Doesn’t matter to me. Just means my chances to make Ice call me Big Brother have increased. No problem.
Denmark: Right, best buddy?!
Norway: You’re noisy, Brother.
Denmark: Oh right, why don’t you call me Big Bro too, Bro?!
Norway: That’s got nothing to do with anything. You’re so annoying.
Finland: This is how Denmark and Nor always interact. But I don’t think it means that Nor doesn’t like Denmark. Whatever happens, it seems like Nor spends a lot of time with Denmark.
Denmark: Right, best buddy!
Norway: Go away, Brother.
Finland: Right, Sve? You think Denmark and Nor get along pretty well too, right?
Sweden: Mm. Oh! *glare*
Finland: Why are you glaring at me, Sve?!
Sweden: (thinking) I just wanted t’ point out that we get along pretty well too, but…
Sweden: (thinking) But it’s just too embarrassing, so I guess ‘ll keep m’ mouth shut.
Finland: Sve? Nngh… I can’t be sure since he’s not saying anything, but I don’t think he’s doing this because he’s angry or anything.
Denmark: Hmm? Fin and Sverige. What’s up?
Finland: Oh nothing. Sve’s always quiet like this.
Norway: If something’s up, you could always talk to us about it. I know Brother’s obnoxious, but…
Finland: It’s really nothing. Don’t worry about it. Right, Sve?
Denmark: Well, I guess if it’s really nothing then we don’t need to worry about it. Now, if there are no other objections, shall we hit the booze?!
Sweden: Hmm? How’d this suddenly b’come ’bout drinkin’?
Norway: Brother’s a lush.
Finland: Denmark is a pretty heavy drinker.
Denmark: Butcha know, there was an investigation about it and it turns out that Fin and I are the heaviest drinkers among the Nordics! You’re aimin’ for my position as number one, aren’tcha?!
Finland: Denmark… If you say it like that, it sounds like I…
Denmark: Well whattaya expect?! There are a lotta drinkers at our places! Right, Fin?!
Finland: Ah ha ha… I suppose you’re right, Denmark.
Norway: Don’t expect any help from me if you two drink yourselves into a stupor.
Finland: Nor! But it sure is fun to be able to get together with everyone to have fun and drink.
Norway: If I’m drinking, I’m only doing it in moderation.
Finland: These days things are pretty peaceful between us and there hasn’t been any fighting. If you would have told me all those centuries ago that we’d be able to get together and talk like this, I probably wouldn’t have believed you.That’s because…
It’s now the beginning of the 16th century. Sve and I have just run away from Denmark’s house. A lot of things happened after that, but right now we’re talking about the aftermath of what happened at that house from around the 17-18th century.
Finland: That’s Sve over there. He seems to be glaring at someone, but… Oh, the person he was glaring at was Russia. Things were a little complicated between Sve and Russia at this time.
Finland: Sve seems to be so busy glaring that he hasn’t noticed yet, but…
Denmark: (whispering) The awesome Denmark has made his appearance.
Finland: Ah, look! Denmark is sneaking up behind Sve!
Denmark: I’m gonna snatch him while he’s not payin’ attention! *sneaky footsteps* Once I’m close, I can attack him while his back is wide open! TAKE THIS!! GYAAAAAA!!
Finland: Sve’s in a pinch!
Sweden: What was that? Hm!
Finland: Sve whirled around! But…that’s all he did. Even when he does nothing but turn around, it’s so intense that you can’t help being surprised! Look, even Denmark…
Denmark: WHAAAAA!! …Wait, what just happened?
Finland: Denmark’s attack was dodged. It would be better if he’d just give up now…
Denmark: Ha haa, You can’t withstand my punch! SUCK ON THIS!!
Finland: Denmark is rushing Sve!!
*sounds of Denmark getting the crap beaten out of him*
Denmark: What the hell?! Gwaaa!
Finland: Denmark was the one who attacked from behind, but…
Denmark: Dammit!! He turned the tables on me!!
Finland: Sve beat him up pretty good.
Finland: Sve beat Denmark at his own game and hasn’t got a scratch on him. I wish Denmark would just cut his losses and go home, but I wonder if that’ll happen…
Denmark: I couldn’t call myself a man if I withdrew now!
Finland: Ah! It looks like he really isn’t giving up!
Denmark: AAAARGH, GET READY FOR THIS COUNTERATTACK!!
*Sounds of Denmark getting the crap beaten out of him*
Finland: Sve completely wiped the floor with him again.
Sweden: What was that all ’bout, Denmark?
Finland: Around this time whenever Denmark tried to launch an attack on Sve like that, he always had the tables turned on him. By the way, Nor was supposed to be living with Denmark back then, but his stance was…
Norway: You’re so noisy, Brother.
Finland: Denmark was the one who was obsessed with picking a fight, so he took all the damage himself. And that’s how it was way back when whenever Denmark was wrapped up in his fistfights with Sve. But these days we all get along as members of the Nordic group. Just like this.
Denmark: Ah hee hee~ Gimme ‘nother beer!
Norway: You’re drinking too much, Brother. And on top of that, you’re just way too noisy.
Sweden: Let’s get somethin’ else t’ eat from th’ menu. It’s good. Y’ want some, Fin?
Finland: Oh you’re right. It all looks so good! I’ll have some!
Denmark: Ooh hoo hoo~ Looks good!
Finland: Sve is pretty peaceful these days, but around the 17th century…
Sweden: Y’ guys…
Finland: At that time, he was up against the tag team of Nor and Denmark, as well as Russia’s place, France and Spain, Lithuania and Poland and won. Thus he became known as the ruler of the Nordics. He was super strong! Oh by the way, I went into battle against Lithuania and Poland with Sve.
Sweden: What’s up? Yer awful quiet, Fin.
Finland: Oh, sorry! I was just wrapped up in some old memories. Speaking of old times, Sve had a boss with a pretty cool nick name way back when.
Sweden: King Lion.
Finland: Yes, him! He was known as the Lion of the North or something, wasn’t he? That sounds pretty cool, doesn’t it!
Sweden: Oh! *glare*
Finland: Why’re you suddenly glaring at me, Sve?!
Sweden: (thinking) I was just turnin’ around.
Finland: Huh? Could it be that you were just turning around?
Finland: S-sorry! You just have such a forceful presence that it surprised me! Umm, so what was it that you wanted to say?
Sweden: King Lion was pretty famous, but ‘is daughter Christina was a pretty int’resting boss too.
Finland: Oh, Ms. Kristina? What kind of person was she?
Sweden: She b’came queen at 6 years old.
Sweden: ‘N’ by th’ time she was 20, she started plannin’ her r’tirement.
Finland: Th-that’s so soon.
Sweden: After a few more years, she completely abdicated th’ throne and went off on a journey.
Finland: Eh?! Kristina retired?!
Sweden: She travelled all over th’ place.
Finland: She certainly sounds like a free spirit. And you were alright with that, Sve?
Sweden: She seemed t’ be enjoyin’ herself so it was fine.
Finland: Sve’s expression didn’t change much but he seems to be feeling nostalgic. I’m sure he’s thinking about what a good queen she was.
Denmark: Wa ha ha~ o’more over here pleeease!
*Denmark falls over*
Finland: Wha! What happened, Denmark?!
Norway: Stupid Brother. You drank too much.
Denmark: That huuurt~
Finland: Denmark sure seems to be in a good mood.
Norway: Guess I better take this idiot ‘n’ go home.
Finland: Well, with Denmark in this shape, I suppose we might as well adjourn for the day.
Sweden: Might ‘s well.
Finland: Sve agrees. Next time let’s all get together, including Ice.
Denmark: Up we go… Ah, that hurt.
Norway: You drunkard.
Finland: Ha ha! Well, we’ll see you next time Nor and Denmark!
Sweden: See ya.
Norway: Come on, Brother. You want me to leave you behind?
Finland: With that, our Nordic meeting ended without us deciding anything.
Sweden: I just had fun meetin’ up with ever’one again.
Finland: It certainly was a lot of fun. Maybe it’s alright that it turned out this way. Alright then everyone, moi moi!